If love is a labor Ill slave till the end

Oh my god, last night was so amazing that I seriously hesitate to describe it on my blog because I know that I cant capture its radiance. I have never felt so clear headed and content. Its like I realized last night that none of the shit that I normally care about matters at all.

Being surrounded by people who know themselves as well as Sara and Kelley do is seriously a privilege. I just cant express it. I seriously fell in love with both of them in the last 24 hours. And in Sara's case, thats really saying something, since I already call her my best friend (besides Davies). I found a haven outside Gamma Phi... now I just hope that Sara doesnt mind sharing it with me.

It sounds so simple, but it just wasnt. It started off with good intentions, but then we lured Kelley in with cigarettes and ding-dongs. Then we drank wine. Then we went on campus and cuddled and talked. Then we drove to Emery Point and sat on rocks with our feet in the water and watched the sun come up. It was amazing.

After that we went back to Kelley's and fell asleep in a triple spoon formation for three hours. After waking up, we pretty much just laid around smoking, eating, talking, and cuddling until I absolutely had to come back to the house for meeting.

I LOVE making new friendships, reveling in good old ones, and living life to the fullest. Today rocks. The last 24 hours have been filled with radiance... thats the only way I can state it.

I know this did not do the experience justice. I know I will never be able to record it. But Ill always remember, and thats what matters.

This is a list of happy things for me to think about when Im upset next:
-Spidey Jones
-Emery Point Sunrises
-Triple Spooning
-Cigarettes and coffee
-Kelley's shower
-Aurora Borealis
-The tube and my painting
-SARA AND KELLEY

Forget regret or life is yours to miss

Notables:

- The people across the way from me like to have loud sex. Like REALLY loud. It is absolutely the most hysterical thing ever. I adore it. Or is that creepy? Oh who am I kidding, I dont care.
- I just bought a ticket for Sara to come visit me in London!!!! Oh my god, I am so looking forward to this study abroad business more now. Goddamn, I give the best Christmas/Graduation/Birthday/every occasion for the rest of her life presents EVER. I have so much more confidence in my ability to remain sane in the upcoming semester now. Yay!
- I went to 3 out of my 4 classes today, which is AMAZING for me. I even went to my Jew Class. Top that, bitches.
- I finally know what my undergrad thesis is going to be about! It came to me in this really weird burst of inspiration in class today. Basically, I'm going to write about how the suburban environment effects the social order, but Im going to focus on popular culture. Pretty much, Ill be writing about American Beauty, Weeds, and Say Anything and what they reveal about how suburbia has changed the American Dream. I fucking love my major. I really hope this gets approved.
- My aunt is purchasing $80 worth of goods for me and my friends from her special club. The purchase is composed entirely of baked goods. I am pumped.

Basically, I am really happy at the moment. If only I didnt have to write a paper proposal in the next 24 hours and a paper draft after that.... damn college.

This is the last time we'll be friends again

Some observations:

- Plum wine and a hot tub go together fabulously.
- Sometimes, a little (or a lot of) public nakedness can be hilarious and liberating.
- I have learned more about myself from talking to Sara for only 2 months than I have from any other single person in my life.
- My $3 Jasper ring means more to me than my $500 high school class ring.
- Im a much more spiritual person than I ever thought I was... I just dont believe in God. The two are not mutually exclusive.
- Registering for classes and buying plane tickets to London is fucking scary, in a totally exhilarating way.
- I miss Robyn.

Mack, over and out.

The sunrise fills your eyes

So the last 24 hours felt like a dream. My old lady was nice, I got delicious sushi with Rachel and Sara (two of my favorite ladies) and hung out with my much-missed Jeanna. Then at like 10 last night I decided I wanted to go to the beach and made Sara and Teresa go. Oh my GOD, it was amazing. There were so many stars, I couldnt believe it. The water was so peaceful. We stole someone's abandoned bonfire and just laid there talking for like 3 hours. Some of the best "would you rathers" and "would you be my friend ifs" ever were created. And another event of note: I popped my first sober squat. It was a little complicated, but all went smoothly. We also discovered the best possible use of a tampon - they make amazing kindling :-)
The night concluded with Jack In the Box breakfast at 2:30 am and Adult Swim. Sometimes as things are happening you think "this is one of the few things I will remember from college when Im 100" and last night was one of them. So awesome.

Then I slept in and completely skipped my first two classes, because I suck. Next year Im not scheduling anything before 12. Learned about some Buddhist architecture and used my gap to lay in the sun and go to the top of the Campanile for the first time.

Now Im stressed about these 2 massive papers I dont have topics for. BUT... BSR is tonight! Even though I didnt take a little, Im super pumped to have a twin and Shintau finished my blanket, so thats waiting for me with all the new members presents :-) I cant wait for ice cream and going out to Sigma Chi with my awesome family. Woot.

All is well in the world of Jordan.

You're guiltless and free, I hope you take a piece of me with you

So I FINALLY sat down with Stroud and sort of created a game plan for my European travels. So here is my tentative schedule:

January 15- Leave home :-(
January 16- Move into dorms
January 17- Orientation starts
January 22- Classes start
~February 24 through March 3- Sara comes to visit me!!!!
March 10 through 18- Spring Break, leaving it open so I can travel with folks I meet there
April 5 through 9- Easter Break, going to Athens and Greek Islands with Ashley
April 27- Classes end
May 9- Finals End
May 10- Leave London
~May 10 through 16- Hang out in Rome... the only part of my trip where I'll be alone
~May 17 through 20- Amsterdam with Ashley
~May 21 through 24- Return to Ashley's school with her (it is near Venice)... I'll probably stay in a hostel in Venice though
~May 25 through 28- Prague with Ashley
~May 29- Leave Europe :-(
~May 30- Arrive either at home, or in NYC to visit Teresa. This depends on whether or not she goes home for the summer.

So I'll either get home around May 30 or June 7, depending on T-dawg's plans.

I am so excited.

Older chests reveal themselves like a crack in the wall, starting small and grow with time

We'll do this in bullet form again:

- I FINALLY finished my midterms and midterm papers. I spent all Friday morning writing a 5 page paper at the last minute, but its fucking done and my relief is palpable. I still feel the urge to go to the living room though, oddly enough, and find it strange that I dont have any pressing academic tasks.
- Sara's performance as Skyler Paks was just about the best thing of my life. Hilarious shit, my friends. Sara as a man is amusingly natural.
- Shintau's surprise birthday party went off without a hitch. She had no idea, yay. I, however, drank FAR too much. It wasnt even that much really, its just that I never go out anymore. I woke up barfing at 5:30 and did it every half hour till around noon. Dry heaving= not good. Also, barfing in your hands as you run to the bathroom= not good. I then proceeded to literally spend the entire day watching movies with my ass firmly planted on the couch.
- Ive been a terrible friend lately to someone who matters very much to me. I dont know why Im doing it, but I think its because Im afraid were getting too close and shell be able to hurt me. Im on the defense with her, when shes the last person in the world I need to be like that with. I just hope she stays patient with me and doesnt give up because Im totally neurotic. Gah.
- Talked to Davies today, and it made me really happy. Hearing a voice from home is always good, especially when were both in hungover pain at the same time, despite the fact that shes on the other side of the world.

In conclusion, I am feeling really good about my academic situation and my friends at home, but worried about my friends here. I need to work on it. I wish there was a reset button you could press on a friendship and just erase all the stupid things I've said and done. Too bad.

And on a happier note, I came up with the best idea ever. Over Christmas break, Sara is gonna come up and visit me in tha SCV and the two of us, plus Davies and Lepp, are gonna go to Magic!! It will be amazing! And if you object to paying for that, as I sort of do, we can do Disneyland instead, but the 4 of us NEED to hang out. Youll both love her.

Edit: I just bought my airplane ticket to go abroad. I guess this is really happening. I leave on January 15 @ 5 in the afternoon... dear sweet jesus.

You said tonight is a wonderful night to die. Look at all those stars, look at how goddamn ugly those stars are.

Its 4:30 am. I have a midterm in 5 hours and another in 8. I am fucked. There are 2 lectures I havent even looked at, but I think I need to sleep more. This is pathetic.

Ive been studying ALL DAY. No-Doze doesnt keep you awake for that long, and Im afraid to take more. But dude, was I alert for awhile.

I fucking hate midterms. This time tomorrow I will be slightly relieved, but still working on a paper. After Friday at 4pm I will fucking cry with joy. Then I will cry with laughter, because Sara is in a drag king show. She's singing "Sexy Back" and her name is "Skyler Paks." That is going to be AMAZING.

I have spent the last 48 hours in the living room with Sara, my computer, coffee, cigarettes, no-doze, and cookies. I feel collegiate in the worst possible way.

I picture you in the sun

I didnt get a little sister, but I did get a Brazilian. I feel like a prepubescent boy or, as Sara put it, a plucked chicken.

If I could fast forward my life to Thursday night, I would. Fucking midterms make me want to die.

I am obsessed with Joseph Arthur's "A Smile That Explodes." It is so fucking pretty.

I need a cigarette or 6 million to deal with this stress.

Dont lift me up with your strong intent on dropping me back down

I have been high for the last 24 hours, and it felt good. I ate way too much food, watched quite a bit of the Flava of Love, and saw a man I thought was dead. Turns out he was just super drunk and passed out on the sidewalk. Nice, huh?

Davies, I got your postcard and it made me super happy! I literally jumped up and down. Teresa thought I was nuts. Thanks a lot!!

Now, for the business- I have 3 midterms on Thursday. I am pretty screwed, but for the next few days its all business I think.

And for the personal- drama is lame and pisses me off. People make up so much stuff in their heads, and I just try to pretend none of it is happening. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesnt. Gah. Oh well, I know what/who matters to me.

She looks like heaven, maybe this is hell

Today my old lady told me that I should lose weight. She then proceeded to tell me that the only way to do that is to eat less. And to suggest that I eat carrots when I get hungry. Damn old lady.

I also noticed that she has a book entitled "When You Ride Alone, You Ride With Bin Laden." Fucking crazyass liberal. And I'm pretty damn liberal.

I also forgot to mention that this weekend Sara and I were growled at by an ostrich. Seriously. A fucking ostrich. It was really weird and awesome at the same time.

Does anyone else love Jordan Knight's "Give It To You" as much as I do? I doubt it.

I buy my crack and smack my bitch right here in Hollywood

So in my last post I forgot to mention the best thing ever - they played Ok Go at the club I went to!!! This is a big part of why I said we'll be going for sure over Christmas break. Oh my god, so amazing. And on to some visual aids for all these blog entries:

My new piercing, because I can't really describe it accurately

Me and the new pupster, Kooty. She is SO CUTE.

I am so lazy, and I have so much to do. But such is life. I contributed positively to class for the first time this year today. I actually recalled something from Arch 170, aka naptime for Jordan and Sara.

Over the course of the 10 hours of driving I did this weekend without my Ipod or radio I really rediscovered some winners off of old random CDs. It's good.

I better go work on my problem sets. Sigh.

More Later

In the last 24 hours Ive:

- Met my ADORABLE puppy
- gone to Lombardi's Ranch
- gotten my conch pierced (its not dirty, its a part of my ear)and watched Sara get her lip pierced
- napped
- talked to my mom and had free Mimis Cafe
- gone to the Ruby, a sweet club in Hollywood
- watched Timon and Pumbaa with Teresa and Sara
- realized how much I love my friends