I dont believe in you anymore

Ah my unavoidable return to the North American continent. So I've been home for awhile now. A lot of stuff has happened, both here and abroad, and I (for some reason) feel very little or no inclination to record said events in this previously-overused blog.

It took 36 hours to get from Barcelona to San Francisco, which is completely ludicrous. Here's the rundown:

1. Flight from Barcelona to Madrid
2. Layover in Madrid
3. Flight from Madrid to New York *our flight to SF was canceled due to bad weather*
4. Shuttle to New Jersey, a lovely night spent at the Econolodge of Elizabeth, NJ
5. Early morning flight from Newark to Chicago *this flight was late so we had to literally run as fast as we could to our other flight... barely made it*
6. Flight from Chicago to San Francisco *SWEET RELIEF*

I hate the process of traveling but love seeing things - its a serious dilemma.

Anyhow, I am safe and sound and pretty happy (at least when Im in the Bay Area). Living with Stephanie is the best thing ever - I am completely in love with her and I am so glad we decided to do this.

Being home is mostly strange. Nothing is quite how I remember it. Things have lost their sheen, if that makes any sense at all, which Im sure it doesnt. For the first time I feel like my home is actually in Berkeley and I go to Southern CA for little breaks.

Im totally stressed out about money, my thesis, applications for big girl jobs/grad school/fellowships, and getting a job for the year.

I miss being abroad like you would NOT believe. I dont ever want to be confined to the United States for a long period of time. I miss the adventures I had and just the feeling of being somewhere new. But I guess I appreciate being home too, just in a different way. Ugh.

Despite all this, I would say that Im relatively happy. And, honestly, that is mostly thanks to Stephanie. She makes me smile even when Im crying. Shes the best.