My problem is you make me melt and I don’t want to be frozen anymore

Oh, Christmas. How I love thee. This year I mostly got money and gift certificates, but that’s good. I also got 2 really cute sweaters, more perfume, Big Love on DVD, 2 books, jewelry from my grandma, London street maps, and new I-Pod headphones. All in all, an excellent morning followed by relaxing sleep in my amazing bed, breakfast that featured Boysenberry syrup (mmmmmmm…) and a dinner that was so delicious I almost cried. Then I went to Kelley’s house and we had a bottle of wine on the beach at Malibu. There’s simply no better way to celebrate the birth of Jesus.

Today I got to buy a video game and see Sara and her fucking ADORABLE puppy. Plus I got a hold of the videos of me and Kelley from the highest day of my life. They are simply hilarious and will undoubtedly be shown to all who appreciate such things. Despite the fact that we (Kelley, Sara, and I) engage in some behavior that is probably less than socially appropriate, I think we’re incredible. Not many people can say that they’ve licked whipped cream off the breasts of their two best friends. No, not many – but I can. Ha. I adore my friends… and brandy cappuccino drinks.

It’s starting to really hit home how little time I have left here. And just how long I’m going to be in London. This is not a vacation. I am simply moving to a foreign country. Good Christ. Tomorrow I have my pre-departure health check and I have to get a meningitis shot. I’m SO scared of shots. Yes, I have 7 piercings, 2 of which are in my face. Yes, I have a tattoo. My fear is not logical, but it is a fear nonetheless. After this appointment, there are exactly 19 days until I get on a plane for England. eek.

Now for a short outline of my schedule for the next few weeks (this is more for me than for you, feel free to skip):

12/27: Doctor Appointment, dinner with Megan
12/28: Shopping with my mom (yay!)
12/30: Tenacious D movie with Sara and Kelley
12/31: New Years Eve in Hollywood with Justin Ziegler
1/3: See Abra and Beth (yay!)
1/4: Lunch with Robyn and Rachel Hill (ought to be interesting)
1/5: Go to Sara’s, spend the night
1/6: Go to Pow-Pow’s house in Palm Springs!!!
~1/10: Meet Alex, one of the girls going abroad with me, in Mission Viejo for lunch
1/13: Spend the night at Sara’s in Fontana
1/14: See Sara and Kelley for the last time
1/15: Leave the country

I don’t even know when I’m coming back, or where I’ll be coming from. I’m still not really ok with not having Adam in my daily life, but I’m getting over it. It will be so amazing when I come back to Berkeley and get to live with him. I know I’ll be just fine.

Yes, I know I sound like a broken record, but this whole going abroad thing is really trippy. And I really really love my friends a lot. I have never before felt like there were so many people in my life that I genuinely love and who genuinely love me. I am so FUCKING lucky, I just cant get over it. And I feel like leaving that behind might be a big mistake. At the same time, I know I’ll never regret this, and that’s why I’m doing it. Still, at my core, every fiber of my being is screaming “STAY! Sara, Kelley, Adam, and Jeanna make it worth it!” I just have to ignore that. I just have to go and trust that it will be amazing and worth it. Sigh.

My life is so amazing, I am so lucky. I should never ever forget that.